Hello, my friends,
I just spent almost three weeks on the road.
It all started in this incredible theatre in upstate NY, with a speaking engagement about the power of mindfulness. A few hundred wonderful educators showed up, and it didn’t occur to me to take photos until they all left. I signed lots of books and felt like a real writer. It was awesome.
Then, I spent a couple of days in the super cute Saratoga Springs, NY. I walked around the sweet downtown area and visited the apothecary because you simply must visit an apothecary whenever possible.
I planned to do a little writer’s retreat to work on my new book, but the timing was brutal. I mostly sat in my hotel room, watching the election results come in and feeling all the anxiety I had just told hundreds of people how to manage. After that, all I could do was cry and do yoga.
Then, I attempted to get myself together to lead a three-day Writing & Yoga for Anxiety workshop (HA!) at Kripalu in Massachusetts. It was literally called How to Survive in a Challenging World. These beautiful souls showed up, and we talked and laughed and made a plan forward.
When that ended, I had a two-hour break, and then I hosted a five-day Mission Flexible Veterans retreat with the most attendees ever. We did yoga, meditation, writing, somatics, breath work, Qigong, art therapy, archery, and an outdoor mindfulness experience.
Next, I participated in a three-day kick-off program for a generous Kripalu grant I received for my Veteran work. It was hosted by the wonderful Rolf Gates, who wrote Meditations from the Mat, one of my all-time favorite yoga books. He repeatedly got my name wrong: “Lisa Jakubs” — and all I could do was giggle like a fan girl and decide maybe my last name should have an “s” after all.
Then I drove 11 hours home.
And I felt like my head was no longer connected to my body.
Not gonna lie; it was an insane stretch of work that has left me depleted and exhausted.
It’s hard to say no to things that are meaningful to you. It’s hard to admit your own energetic limitations. But it’s really fucking clear when you exceed them.
So what do we do when we realize it’s been too much? When we look behind us and see the vague outline of our limits, lying in the dust about three miles back?
We learn, regroup, and plan to do it differently next time.
Because it’s inevitable sometimes. Out of necessity, or poor planning, or just a fluke, life is going to push us beyond what is reasonable.
Sometimes we only know where our boundaries are because they are crossed — by ourselves or others. It’s tempting to do all kinds of regretful self-flagellation. But in reality, this kind of misstep helps us understand and refine where we need to draw those lines. It reminds us how important boundaries are to our well-being.
And above all — we offer grace.
We have to give ourselves a shit-ton of grace. We have to extend that grace to others as well, because when we are depleted, we are not as generous of spirit as we might be otherwise. When we lack that pool of inner resources, everything feels impossible, from work to relationships to getting the mail. I burst into tears trying to open a child-proof package yesterday.
Things can get difficult, my friends. We get overwhelmed, betrayed, hurt, lost, uncertain, insecure, and disappointed.
But there is also beauty, connection, hope, joy, laughter, and dogs.
This, too, shall pass. All of it.
So we hold all of it gently. We rest when it becomes too much. And then we get up and put one foot in front of the other.
I’ll meet you there, soon.
Just not yet.
Here are some things I’ve been finding supportive:
This meditation is more like a poem
“Allow this practice to help you cultivate a deepening well of self-compassion - the capacity to honor all the elements that make you gloriously, imperfectly human.”
This meditation has been on repeat for about a week. Sometimes, I listen twice in a row.
Alchemy Of The Heart: Harmonize Your Inner Landscape
When I need to laugh
Hello, World. Nate Bargatze is known as The Nicest Man in Stand-Up. His comedy is so gentle yet hilarious, as he shares thoughts on controversial topics such as buying ice and what happens if an eagle touches your head. I love filthy language, but the harshest word he uses is “sucks,” and he apologizes for it. It’s fantastic, and I need that kind of tenderness right now.
What is helping
The folks at Komuso sent me the Classic Shift mindfulness tool, and I love it.
When I’m feeling anxious, I use this to practice pranayama (a breathing exercise) with an extended exhale. It’s one of my favorite ways to activate the parasympathetic nervous system and find some peace. I breathe into it, and the tested chamber slows the exhale to 8+ seconds, which relaxes the nervous system and can relieve anxiety. And when I’m not using it, it just sits there looking super cute.
It is pricey, but they are doing a black Friday sale, so that’s up to 30% off, and you can get an additional 15% off with my code. komusodesign.com/LISAJAKUB Feel free to share with anyone who might benefit.
Thank you for reading, my friends. As we move into the holiday season, I hope you double down on the things that help you feel grounded and whole. The world needs you.
Much love,
~Lisa